Just some thoughts

This post will have no pictures and may not be interesting to anyone but me, but I just had a few thoughts on my mind that I needed to get out somewhere, and since this blog is a record of our little family, here is where it will go.

I am so happy that Jacob is back with our family! It feels so good to be together again. Jacob came home on Saturday, and Saturday night, Rachel came down with a fever, which meant that Jacob had to stay home with her on Sunday while I took Kent to church. I felt bad to make him miss church when he had only been able to go once in the last 4 weeks, but I was so grateful that he was there to stay home with her. Finding a sub for Singing Time in Primary would not be easy last minute like that. And I almost cried when I came home from church to see that the breakfast dishes had been loaded into the dishwasher! No one but me has done that in over a month!!! It is the little things that I missed. Snuggling with him in bed. Help with one of the kids at bed time. Talking to him about my day instead of just bottling everything up inside. Having his support and encouragement after a hard day with the kids, and let me tell you, this last month was full of hard days. Poor Jacob. Instead of spending our time together after the kids were asleep partying, he had to hug me while I cried and tried to work through some of the stress and emotions I had been bottling up while he was gone. He is such a good and supportive husband. I couldn't find a better match for me if I scoured the entire earth. It was so nice to have him home for the entire day today. I am so thankful for Labor Day and that it gave our family a day of much needed together time before Jacob had to start back into the busyness and craziness that is his work and school here. It was so fun to have family night as a complete family again, and then during scriptures tonight poor Rachel got a bloody nose. And let me tell you,  it was the worst bloody nose she has ever had (not that she has had very many in her short little life.) Rachel has croup and has been quite sick. Poor thing. Her nose tonight was just flowing blood. I don't get very squeamish around blood, being a non practicing nurse, but I was actually starting to get worried about her. She was getting freaked out and I was singing primary songs to her while I helped her to help her calm down, but when it started coming out of both nostrils she got really scared. The song I had been singing her was "A Child's Prayer." So right there in the middle of helping her with a crazy bloody nose, I asked her to close her eyes and I said a prayer to Heavenly Father. I asked for her to have peace, and I asked for her bloody nose to stop. After the prayer, Rachel had no more tears, and within a minute she had stopped bleeding. I don't know how long we were in the bathroom trying to get it to stop, but it was at least 10 minutes, maybe longer. 10 minutes can seem very long when you are seeing blood come out of your little child, and you are unable to stop it. I was so grateful that Jacob was there to help with Kent. Kent came into the bathroom with us once and shut the door and turned out the light, which of course didn't make things easier. Instead of me having to try to deal with it, Jacob came in, turned the light back on, and took Kent out to go color. I was so grateful. While I am sad that Rachel is sick, and also sad that the timing coincided exactly with Jacob coming home, I am glad that he has been home to help instead of all of this happening while he was gone.  I know that Heavenly Father answers prayers, and that he loves me. While this last month has been the hardest possibly of my life, I have seen his tender mercies through out it all. One day while Jacob was gone I was having a really really hard day. I mean really hard. I had decided to cut some pictures out of some old Ensigns that we had lying around to put in a book for Kent to look at during church. I found this random Ensign that was from when Jacob and I were first married. So this Ensign was 6 years old. I was looking through it, looking to see if there were any pictures worth cutting out of it, not reading it or anything when I opened it to an article that was specifically for families of military members and dealing with separations. It was a tender mercy. It showed me that the Lord was mindful of me and that he knew what I was going through. Why would I have saved this random Ensign through countless moves across the country when every time we move, I get rid of more and more stuff? Why did this specific Ensign get saved? I don't remember reading anything in it. We weren't even in the military when we received it. I was working nights and going to school and probably didn't even read it when we first got it. Why on this hard hard day did I decided to do something I've never done before and why was I able to find this magazine so easily and inside my house, when things we don't use are in boxes in the garage? I just looked. I will tell you why. Heavenly Father knew that I would need comfort and he loves me enough to give it to me. He wants to help me. I am so grateful for that Ensign for reminding me of the tremendous love that He has for me and how blessed I really am. So I just looked at that Ensign again. This particular Ensign came out in June of 2008. Jacob and I were married in May of that same year, just one month earlier. This was probably the first Ensign we had in our home after we got married. The very first one. We had no plans to join the military at that time. None. I'm telling you, tender mercies from the Lord. Here is a link to the article in case anyone is interested. https://www.lds.org/ensign/2008/06/armor-of-battle-armor-of-god?lang=eng
I think that is all of my ramblings for the night. My eyes are getting tired and my thoughts jumbled, and I have a handsome boy in my bed upstairs that probably needs to be snuggled with. :) I'm so glad he's home.